Our approach
What we will not ask you to choose
In a couple from two traditions, each person often fears being the one who gives way. These are the choices we do not put to you.
Your faith or your partner's
We do not rank traditions or ask either of you to give one up. We ask what each practice means to you and how you want it to look at home.
Your family or your partner
Parents and in-laws matter in many families. We talk with the two of you about them, and a family member joins a session only if you both ask.
Your first language or the shared one
Sessions are in English or in Spanish. If a feeling is easier to say the way you first learned it, say it that way.
Your way of arguing or theirs
Some families raise their voices and make up; others go quiet for days. Neither style is wrong. We help you find what works between the two of you.
Whose holidays and whose table
Which holidays you keep, which foods you cook and where you spend them are for the two of you to settle. We make room to talk, and we do not give out a winner.
How you were raised or will raise children
If children are part of your plans, we help you say what you want to keep, change or let go of from each home. We do not tell you which tradition is right.
What we ask instead
The questions we start with
We start with what matters to each of you, one at a time, and with what you do not want to lose.
What does this tradition mean to you?
What are you afraid of losing?
What do you want your home to feel like?
Who do you want in the room, and who not?
A note on faith
Alcove does not offer religious counseling, and we do not speak for any faith. Our clinicians do not need to share your tradition to hear what it means to you.
If you would like a faith leader to be part of the work, tell us. We would first talk about what would be shared, and with your written permission we can speak with them.
Write to us and tell us who the two of you are
You do not have to explain everything. Tell us which times suit you and which language you would like.